Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Giving Up.

Its Wednesday already! CRAZY!!! This week has been flying by! I have no clue why this week and not last week! 

I have been doing allot of soul searching the last few weeks. I know I have not dug deep into my life for some time so I figured better late than never!
God has been opening so many doors and all, and I have been seing more and more everyday how much I need to be seeking His face more than I ever have! 
Maybe that has come with growing up. Im finally realizing just how much I have not incorporated the things into my life I need to! I am so glad that its never too late for me!

I love the quote above! It is so true!
I think so often we (and when I say we I am including myself in that) want to think if we admit that we feel that way, we are less of a person or something! I always want to be strong and make it seem like I have it all pulled together! I have to take a reality check and be honest with myself first, than I'll be honest with others.
I don't have it all together, and I must admit I wont ever have it all together. I will always have something that I cannot understand or control  But its ok! I do not have to control everything in my life!
For those of you who are RLF's (real life friends) or anyone who has been a bloggy friend for some time know, you know that I have this need to be in control of so much! I am a planner...I want it all set out and than when we get that plan we are going to stick with it! And so help me if those plan's get changed!
I am learning to LET GO! I will tell you, its not been easy! I think in the last week I have felt more like a 5 year old than I ever have! I have stomped my feet, yelled, and complained to God so much! " But I had this planned and I don't want to give that up!"   " Why should I have to give up MY time!"
Than as always I hear the "still small voice". "It was never yours to hang on to!" 
Sigh, Yes God I hear you.
So hard, yet I have to let go and just step back!

Andrew txted me on Sunday and after 30min I finally admitted I was having an attitude about letting go of some things I wanted for my weekend down in Texas. The txt I got back broke me. The Its going to be ok we will have fun and its ok to change some plans attitude he had slapped me in my face.  It was time to snap out of it!

Anyone else have trouble letting go of life??



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